Don’t Talk To Me at the Grocery Store
Testimonials
“Carmiya Weinraub is hilarious! Nothing but rave reviews!”
-Congregation Beth Shalom, Atlanta, GA
“Carmiya is a hilarious comedian.
Easy to work with, so fun and communicative,
she makes the booking through performance smooth and easy.”
-Gordon Center for Performing Arts, Owings Mills, MD
“…Your humor resonated deeply with everyone present. Your wit, timing, and delivery were impeccable, and you created an atmosphere that had everyone laughing from start to finish. It’s not easy to get such a strong response, but you made it look effortless.”
– Jewish Heritage Club of Two Rivers, Odenton, MD
“As a modern Orthodox woman and mom, Carmiya has the magical ability to blend everyday “life” chaos with wit. Her comedy is the perfect balance of hilarious and wholesome. Highly recommend!”
-Temple Beth Ami, Rockville, MD
“It’s not fair that Mama gets paid to be funny.”
-One of her children
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Upcoming Shows / Tickets
June 11, 2026
Give A Hoot
Gaithersburg, MD
June 14, 2026
KVETCH Comedy w/ Erik Angel @ Philly JCC
Philadelphia, PA
June 18, 2026
Private Event
Rockville, MD
July 12, 2026
The Shalom Club – Greenbriar @ Whittingham – Private Event
Monroe, NJ
Seen at:
STANDUP NY, NPR, DC COMEDY LOFT, CITY WINERY NYC, JCC OF GREATER BOSTON, BENDER JCC, INTERFAITH COMEDY, CONGREGATION BETH SHALOM, DC COMEDY FESTIVAL, UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA @ SANTA BARBARA, GIVE A HOOT COMEDY CLUB, THE PORT COMEDY CLUB, TEMPLE RAMAT ZION, TEMPLE SOLEL, ADAMS CENTER MOSQUE, BEN YEHUDA PIZZA, CHAR BAR RESTAURANT, GORDON CENTER FOR THE PERFORMING ARTS, CHABAD OF POTOMAC, SILVER SPRING BLACK BOX THEATRE, ITHACA COLLEGE, POZEZ JCC, TEMPLE BETH AMI, PEARLSTONE RETREAT CENTER, JEWISH-ISLAMIC DIALOGUE SOCIETY, TIFERETH ISRAEL CONGREGATION, IMPROBABLE COMEDY, SILVER SPRING BLUES FESTIVAL, AGUDAS ACHIM CONGREGATION, COMMUNITY OF CHRIST CHURCH, GRASSROOTS COMEDY, ZISSIMOS BAR – THE LOU ROOM, STAND UP SHOWS TO GO, KEHILAT PARDES SYNAGOGUE and more!
Bio
Carmiya Weinraub is a DC-based comedian and comedy coach whose jokes reveal what life is like being a mom of 5 kids (exhausting) and being an observant Jew (exhausting, and kind of yummy). She has performed at Standup NY, the DC Comedy Loft, and the Interfaith Comedy College Tour. She is a regular at local clubs in DC and Maryland.
Carmiya has been featured on NPR and the Washington Jewish Week for creating Interfaith Comedy, a nationally-touring show with comedians of different religions that aims to reduce prejudice and dispel myths.
She has worked as a teacher, social worker, group facilitator, vegetable-deliver, and errand-avoider, all while raising 5 children.
Media
Washington Jewish Week
“Rockville’s Carmiya Weinraub Dispels Prejudice Through Laughter”
June 6, 2025
No, I Know – Podcast
Aired on NPR with Delmarva Public Media
We Heart Moms – Podcast
Carmiya is interviewed on Episode 24: There Is A Stage For You
February 18, 2022